PRACTICE MAKES PERFECT! Isn't that's the way it should be? Somehow, for me, that just didn't appear to be true..my 3rd practical training which is also the last one made me felt like i'm goin back to zero, and even worse than the 1st one..and it's all because of the class control..
no i am not about to blame the kids nor the school despite the fact it is totally different from my previous schools especially the last one which was a complete opposite..but as a teacher, we are supposed to be prepared to face any kinds of situation, or in this case - kids attitude and manners..
what i can clearly say is that, kids from different areas does imply a different approach towards their teachers..whether it is because they are accustomed to it or it is their own way of responding and expressing themselves..that is why we just cannot simply conclude that kids on a specific age range will act and respond the same way as their peers..lifestyle does effect kids perception and i think that might be the case here..
i was somewhat like having a great culture shock when i first arrived there & meet the kids..it was not as welcoming as i thought it would be..& what's more surprising is, there is a total lack of interest upon the art class..maybe i was just too pampered with the fact kids from my previous school does have a lot love for the subject..& yes i know the fact that i am comparing these two totally different kind of kids are just so unfair..
kids in the city tends to have a bigger self-esteem & even braver upon their teacher..while kids in the rural area may have an equivalent or less self-esteem but they tend to still have the humbleness upon their teachers..not that i am saying that city kids does not appear to be humble, just the matter of the amount of their possession upon that attitude..& this differences may actually be the main cause of the big differences in their manner..
what i've learned from the past two session was raising your voice is not the right solution nor way of getting the kids attention & class control..it may work for a short several minutes but you just don't want to keep shouting every five minutes to get the full class control..a sharp direct eye contact may work for some kids, but in some cases, all the feedback that you get is just ignorance..and as an art teacher, it's just almost impossible to be strict as stick or else you'll end up in a dull class teaching some zombie kids..
yea STRICT is the word! but what if as much as you tried to be strict or strict looking but your class control still didnt happen as you have wished for? Maybe the technique? i honestly dont know..this is where i am totally stuck and started to sink this time..maybe i should get beyond the typical strict i've been..start to keep a smelly face from the beginning till the end of the class (which i hardly do)..or maybe just give up and just do what i am capable of? honestly at some point i did came to a stage where i was just so down to myself & felt like givin up on these kids..but you know what, you'll just realized it is not the right thing to do..
while in this school, i just cant stop wondering why when the senior teachers raise their voice even just a bit, those kids will instantly came to silent..but when i did, they hardly pay attention to me but ignore..is it my voice is not loud enough to break their eardrum? is it my intonation not serious or terrifying enough? or is it just me, just a bad teacher? this practical training session really does affect my beliefs as i may say, it does made me think like seriously for many many times whether do i fit the shoes or do i just got the wrong shoes to fit in?
again, i am not trying to blame those kids for being super active or disrespectful towards me..it was me in the first place who failed to gain their respect..while respect is the main ingredients for a good communication, my failure to get or even gain their respect is just a bad start to have a good teacher-student relation..maybe i should work on that first with the right method or else i would just be eaten up in this living hell in the next 3 months..
but the worst part is, i got these two kids who had schooled abroad particularly in Australia & Ireland respectively who appears to have a totally different take on teacher-student relation - in a good way..i was impressed with their passion to catch up and keep up with the lesson despite the obvious different education system they had to adapt..but sometimes when i was just so busy struggling to control the other kids, i did realize how they somewhat seems like lost and felt deserted which i totally didn't mean to..just hoping that they will preserve that very well manner of them instead of infected by their peers..
there are so much more depression to spill out but anyway, who cares..anyway just wish me luck cause i just had a 1st most horrifying observation today as it is a total disaster which i cant even describe how bad it is..till the next post, ciao~
p/s: can't believe i really do miss the old days with those kids in the rural areas..